Introduction (by Charles Darwin)
Book I - "Child Protection" (not to be confused with protecting your children)
The way the boxtickers have handled this topic over recent years has generated so many salaries and created so much inertia that it deserves a whole book to itself!
Book II - Planning
What have property developers got in common with paedophiles? Well just for a start they have caused the creation a bureaucracy so monstrous that it deserves another complete book in this definitive study.
Book III - Bureaucracy, other
Chapter headings will include:
- Health & Safety (obviously)
- Risk Assessments (not to be confused with assessing risks)
- Policies
- Terrorism (how to win a Jihad without actually doing anything)
- Political Correctness (how to minimise the risk that someone will realise that all those words the boxtickers use do not, in fact, mean anything)
- Ofsted
- Defra (as in TWO ear tags? and surely you didn't mean electronic tagging of SHEEP??)
- Auditors
- Authorities, Local (not to be confused with authorities as in "people who know what they are talking about")
HEY GUYS - ANYONE MISSING FROM THE LIST? (e.g. Environmental Health - what do they do? Presumably they're screwing things up for someone?) DETAILS PLEASE.
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dont forget the waste management licence (prevention of recycling) regulations, or whatever they're called!
ReplyDeleteI think Environmental Health's job is to stop people from reusing jars for homemade jams, chutneys etc. Also, this may be wrong, but I think that TRADING STANDARDS have some role in making life difficult for people who have small numbers of livestock. Chec k it out!
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